Brainy-lack

When you are responsible for as many people as I am on a daily basis, it is imperative to be aware, dedicated and disciplined at all times, also known as A.D.D. ... oh wait that's not what A.D.D. stands for.

OK so I may not be the most focused mother, my children might have to keep me on track once in a while and sometimes I get a little distracted. As long as we don't pass too many mirrors, or go to a butterfly conservatory after school to do our homework, I am usually pretty focused.

I also do several headcounts throughout the day, which looks very silly because I often forget what number I am supposed to be counting up to, and sometime I call out other children's names that are not mine, which causes complete panic..."Mommy, who's Ashley? Are you having another baby" (That question ends with me passing out, and then needing a very tall drink)

Yesterday we just happened to be at a mirrored butterfly museum...kinda...it was actually a frozen yogurt shop that was colorful, delicious and put me in a comatose state.

Tuesdays and Thursdays are by far the craziest days of the week for us.  We are building a home almost an hour away from where we live now, and have enrolled the children in the school close to the new house.  I thought it would be a brilliant idea to also sign them up for cheerleading by the new house, which means that those two days we have a 4 hour gap between when the girls get out of school and when they have cheer practice.  I am pretty sure everyone in our new neighborhood thinks we either homeless or creepy lingerers.  We hang out where ever I can afford that day, restaurants, book stores, libraries, an occasional gas station...

Yesterday the kids "earned" yogurt...and I just happened to be craving it as well...win win.  My children love food, it is their kryptonite and they will sit like perfect angels while savoring every single bite.  While we were in the store a mom walked by, counted my children and said "You have 5 kids??" .. I was thinking a mean response like "WOW, you can Count??" but instead I smiled because damnit I was eating froyo!  She then complimented me on how well behaved they were.  After they finished their treat they did their homework, and watched some TV...I told you we linger...

I couldn't help but think "I have good kids..I am a GOOD mom!" I was high on my horse...staring at my little "perfects" as I like to refer to them to strangers.

After regaining feeling in my extremities from eating way too much "strawberry delight" I decided it was time to go. I do a headcount and notice one is missing...I see a child outside...unsupervised...shoving something in her pockets...

Must not be my kid...that kid just stole a pound of skittles from the topping bar and where the heck is her mother??

My legs go numb again...that's my kid.

I tell the children its time to leave and run outside, my son doesn't want to go and says "No, not yet!"...the others follow me.  I scold my rainbow-handed daughter all the way to to the car, until I hear "Ma'am!! Ma'am does HE belong to you"

I forgot my son inside...he has a look of disgust and is on the hip of another woman...

This has NEVER happened...I may get distracted but this was a new low. You don't realize how important the little things are...such as the "headcount"..until you fail miserably without it.  Yes my daughter deserved to be spoken to for her poor decision, however I was setting a horrible example by not being responsible myself.  I allowed her to distract me and the result could have been a lot worse than it was.

My daughter IS in big trouble for her actions, and my son wasn't (too badly) traumatized.   Hopefully this was a lesson learned for the entire family.

Point of my story...stay focused..stick to a plan, regardless of the "perfect" circumstances...and never eat so much froyo that it actually freezes your brain to the point of stupidity.

Hope you enjoyed the comedy that is my real life.   Check out my FB page, and please vote for my blog by clicking on the lady that says VOTE FOR ME.