Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Just going with the flow

Children rely on their parents to tell them what to do.  Their days are planned by us, and may change without them ever knowing.  They sometimes only know which day it is by their schedule of events, if they have soccer practice, a birthday party or school to attend.   Children don't have anywhere to be except where we bring them, or tell them they have to be.

Their lives are completely out of their hands.

As parents, we decide when, where and how.  Where we will live, when we will do things and how we will work out all the details.  Our children may affect our decisions, but really they just wait to be told what to do.  

Our family is moving, and going through many changes right now.  My boyfriend and I are the ones who are struggling to keep up, and having a hard time dealing with the chaos.  Our children are just going with the flow.

Attempting to pack is leaving our current home looking like an episode of hoarders and my 2 year old is forced to stay inside so I can get things done.  My daughters have had to make all new friends, again, this is the 4th school for my 9 year old and the 3rd for my 8 year old. 

I can only imagine that they are as equally exhausted as we, the adults, are.  Waking up early, going to bed late.  We have to drive almost an hour each way to the school that is close to our new home, factor in hours of homework, late night dinners, cheerleading practice 3 times a week, and football games that last all day on Saturdays and you've got a very hectic life for any child.

My patience is shorter than usual, and I feel as though I yell more than I talk.

This would be an excuse for any child to act out, do poorly in school, or just have a bad attitude.  This is also life...and my kids, if any, know this.

When I met my boyfriend, he had 3 little girls, and had lost his wife tragically a year before, and I was a single mother, with a fabulous family but never a "father" for my daughter. 

Since then we have merged into a family of 7, adding a baby boy that has helped form an even stronger bond between us.

Our children have gone from having less to more, built new relationships, attended new schools and were given new homes.

You never hear them complain.  They don't ask why often, or use the things that have happened as an excuse.  They just go with the flow.  They are happy, healthy, beautiful children.

I on the other hand do ask why, and I am sure my boyfriend does as well.  We both feel guilty sometimes, but always have the best of intentions.  We strive to give our children more, and can only hope that our hard work is providing that.

In a few weeks we will be in our new house, and my children will continue to do the things that they are "supposed to", because that is all they know.  They will have friends over to play in their new backyard, and sleep in later because their school will be just down the street.

I wish I could always take the burden of life off of my children, even into adulthood, but for now I am thankful that all they have to do is just go with the flow.


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3 comments:

  1. This is really moving. I hope things settle down for you soon. I moved a lot when I was a kid too. It wasn't always easy and I don't think it hurt me in the long run. I think it made me more adjustable. As an adult I can make the best of anything and I can live almost anymore. Maybe the things you feel guilty over now will seem like a blessing later on. Hang in there!

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  2. You are so very lucky that your kids are so easy going. Cherish that! I'm so happy that you guys are going to be settled in soon and wish you an easy, smooth, stress-free move!!

    Teri
    Snarkfest

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  3. Whew...I can relate in so many ways! Not the large family part but the children getting totted along just going with the flow! I have to say although inside you may feel like you're coming apart the reflection that your kids are handling it well shows that you are too! Hang in there and know that in the end, no matter the roller coaster, you're doing what you believe to be best for them!! Found you on the blog hop!! ;-)

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